arraiving at the library today was inspirational- the denver modern art museum was poking into the blue sky sunshine, and scores of people were waiting outside to get through the doors at opening time. i felt a moment of 'i love the library!' and wanted to talk to all the people about what they were going to go in to study- wed design? roof-top gardening? food and memory? the latest from niall fergerson? no. the doors opened and 15% of the waiters headed straight for the bathroom. it was at this point that i noticed that the majority of library-goers were a bums and/or internetless poker junkies. or they needed to watch some online porn. i've glimpsed some hardcore full screen shit going down in there. within three minutes of the library opening every computer was taken one in twenty was using the library catalog. no bother, shley's got a laptop, so all she has to do is find a sunny corner and tap in to access honest library information. mleh- not possible. no wireless access in the PUBLIC library unless you pay five dollars and hour to a PRIVATE internet provider. balls! i can go buy a cup of coffee in the cafe downstairs and use wireless for free, so ok, go buy some coffee- oh, but the chick at the counter can't find the password. where is the password, she just doesn't knooooow.
so shley left in a huff and went to the only known secure, quick, free and reliable internet provider- the mancave. my moment of feeling that the public really does have bookish pursuits came, then went quickly back to thinking that the average internetless public wants no such library catalog access, but rather the sort of qhite trash entertainment that the internet and television so easily provide. there should be a reality show about people watching online porn, then everyone would be smiley. or maybe we just need to instate 100 days of gladitorial gaming.
9 comments:
My first thought is that Marion would put a swift and firm stop to the online pornos in HER library. I understand the whole freedom of information thing, but I'm pretty darn sure the local library here wouldn't allow people to use their online computers for that sort of thing.
I too like to think that all the folks lined up at the computers in our library are following intellectual and public information at my fingertips-type of pursuits, but they are probably just finding out who is lined up for the next NASCAR race.
And now we know why your not the head of programming at any network.
Reality shows about people watching porn are probably not what we want to be watching. Unless you put some guys in a closet to jump out and yell candid camera at the right point in time. That would be hillarious.
whatever, settler bed.
Isn't that what MSNBC has been doing on Dateline where they have child molesters show up at some house to have a party with a kid they met online, then Stone Phillips or somebody and a camera crew come out of the kitchen and say "HELLO!!!! What are YOU doing here?"
so facinating, so bizarre.
That's what you get for living in such a liberal haven. You aren't allowed to enjoy porn in the Bible belt's public libraries. Not to be cornfised with pubic libraries...
stone philips, slamming down the hand of american morality! and that hair!
and the great thing about the public library is that there are pamphlets everywhere explaining internet blocks, for the children.
for gods sake think of the children!
Post a Comment